I hear that Samantha wants to sleep with me,
And Victoria flashes her boobs for all to see,
And April wants to have some sensual fun,
While I download pictures of babes in the sun.

Well if I were to sleep with such a luscious chick,
I’d better get the enlargement system for my dick,
And get some of those cures “as seen on TV”,
And then I will show her how fierce in bed I can be.

Lower mortgage rate and debt rescheduling,
I would love to profit for such a thing,
A mail about a little girl, who badly needs an operation,
Tracking my address book while I think about a donation.

There is no way to unsubscribe from the list,
Even if you get angry and clench your fist,
The mails keep getting to you somehow,
Maybe today, or tomorrow, or even just now.

But unlike other people, I really love spam,
Don’t get me wrong; I am not talking about the ham,
Frequently no one writes me and my inbox is empty,
So I’d rather hear from Samantha to make me feel worthy.