CCM10/04/0619:17 AI ZONE ACHRAFIEH-ABC VISA MERCHANT
2089204010 aut: 788654 4146744443260922 TAREK CHEMALY 10/08
121 2478 52 01 0009 @ 00 02 8 S DEBIT AMOUNT SIGNATURE THANK
YOU FOR YOUR VISIT
My electronic breadcrumbs to find a way back home are my only proofs of
existence, just like the skeletons in my closet are the testimony that my spo-
radic retail therapy has killed someone else out of envy, leaving nothing but
that hanger inside the closed doors.
Cellis – the mobile phone company – is now called Alfa, and Libancell – the
other phone company – is now called MTC touch, and the Premiere line is
now Magic Orange, and the Rose and Crown in Hamra Street is now De
Prague café, and Cat Stevens is now Yusuf Islam, and the vague terrain with
a mechanic workshop is now the site for a new upscale building, and Su-
permarket St. Louis is now Aoun Supermarket, and the shabby convenience
store is now Domino’s Pizza, and Domino’s Pizza is now closed and FOR
RENT, and the banana mini-plantation is now City Mall, and the “Le Monot”
on Monot street became Red/(and then) Shakespeare/(and then) Blush con-
secutively, and the Neptune club is now ABC mall on Sassine Square, and
The Chase restaurant is now The Chase restaurant (But new and – not sure
if – improved), and Matar store is now Markos Bakery (But everyone still
calls the building “Matar” anyway), and Amo Kamil’s store at the bottom of
our building is now Paul the hairdresser (Who sometimes opens the shop and
goes elsewhere), and Monsieur Waked the bookstore is now Jean-Pierre.
What about the memory of the place, of the people, the memory of those who
came and went and those who “Kharaja wa lam ya’od”, “Kharajat wa lam
ta’od” heard so frequently, it ceased to be odd, he or she went out and never
came back, so many of them, so much we lost track. Some 17,000 whose
whereabouts are unknown, those who died, their names got etched in stone,
those who survived the war, are now rotten to the bone, and those who disap-
peared, have no one but their own.
Entire families had their lives in pause mode, they lost a dear one somewhere
along the road, maybe as he went out to fetch the groceries, or maybe lost in
one of those similar stories.
The government proposed to declare them deceased, but it is not easy, and so
much pain cannot be eased, it is not simply a matter of hastening the inherit

ance, it is about things like remembrance and love for instance. It is about
those who are still waiting for loved ones to return, and everyday incense
and candles in front of shrines they burn, some people became more devout
to their religious relics, others simply ceased to believe in God and all his
clerics.
Kidnapped as they were passing some barrack, kidnapped because some
militia launched an attack, maybe perhaps exchange hostages they did lack,
remember: they went out and never came back. Does anyone remember them
while away? A small memory, while passing one way, people pray for the
dearly departed, but what about those who are nearly departed?
And the Jesuit Garden is still the Jesuit Garden but the toys are now safe to
play with – which means they are not fun anymore as they’re not dangerous
like they used to be, and she still lives on the second floor of the building op-
posite the garden, except that now she won’t talk to me.