“Please leave a message after the tone and we will get back to you. Beep”
“Hi, this is Tarek. I got your email and I am calling to tell you that I am
not…”
“Hey.”
“Hey. Yourself.”
“Been a while.”
“Yes, no excuses. I was ducking low. I am now in the US as I told you.”
“How’s it going?”
“I don’t know. Pretty weird. No guidelines to deal with the situation. No
nothing.”
“How are you? How are you coping?”
“Well, I still keep the ringer of the phone off. It still scares the hell out of me.
Maybe some bad news will come my way on the phone.”
“Well, I am still dealing with the issue. I know he was not my brother, he was
yours. But I still didn’t get around to make sense of what happened.”
“Well, it’s understandable.”
“I know it’s been more than a year and half. But sometimes I look at my cell
phone and still expect him to call. Did I tell you how it happened?”
“No, we didn’t talk much about it.”
“It was before the third operation. I had called him and was teasing him,
telling him that he should be happy he’s in the hospital because he ended
up losing all the weight he wanted to lose – and he didn’t have to do it with
some stinky diet. He laughed. You know, his on/off laugh. But by the middle
of the conversation I saw a line flashing at the screen in front of me and then
quickly withdrawing. My international phone card was expiring. I told him
so, and said I’d call again before he went to the operating room. It was a pay
phone on the street. I got lazy and decided not to buy another card. I’d call
again after the operation I thought. Then you phoned me and told me he was
dead. What really bugs me is that I never go to have a proper closure. It’s an
unfinished chapter that comes back on and on.”
“I understand. You know what was the last thing my mother said to me before
she died? “Hang up, this is costing us a fortune.” How’s that for a closure?”
“Listen, I am not overbidding. I know that you’re the one who, in the span of
less than two years, lost your mother, father and brother. But I still lost my
best friend. And he was my best friend.

Want to hear something narcissistic and selfish? One of the reasons I invest
so heavily in our friendship was because I thought that we was young, he’d
stay with me for quite a few years. How was I supposed to know he’d die at
the age of thirty six!”
“If it’s of any comfort, he thought of you as a very close friend as well.”
“I know, I know. I was just so harsh and demanding, but I think he knew that
I was just trying to give him the best I could. How about you? Planning to
have any kids?”
“Are you crazy? I wouldn’t want to bring anyone into such a messed up
world. The kid would end up blaming me as soon as he takes consciousness
of what hell I brought him into. Besides, I can’t afford it.”
“Did you sell any of the plots of the land back in Greece?”
“No, but I did sell the old house. Remember Tassos? I sold it to him. He’s a
distant cousin you know, so it remained in the family sort of. I had a condi-
tion that I’d be able to come back whenever I wanted. It was either that or
losing the whole thing because I still hadn’t paid the transfer taxes.”
“I understand, you don’t have to justify.”
“I am not. Just giving you details. Oh, it’s a good thing you had couloura
bread from Samy’s bakery. He transformed it into a supermarket.”
“That’s sad. But then, he has three mouths to feed. I guess I want the village
in Corfu to remain as I left it. All the bunch of them frozen in time.”
“Well, I understand. I never went back myself. I call them sometimes. Costa
is still working at the same place. His brother is still in Cyprus.”
“Have they finished the house in the orchard?”
“No. They spent the money on registration taxes and permits.”
“I still pray for him you know. At every mass. Sorry I am going back to
the topic. It’s difficult for me to deal with it. I accepted what happened, but
there’s still a lot of lingering. A lot of confusion. I never got to say goodbye
to him. How the hell was I supposed to know?”
“Look, stop doing this to yourself. I told you, he cared a lot about you. When
he was was seriously ill, I’d tell him that so and so called and he’d roll up his
eyes without caring. And then when I’d mention you, he would start crying.
You mattered. You were his friend. Right now just focus on keeping your
head clear with what’s going on back home. Are your folks OK down there?”
“Yes, there’s safe. Well, my brother just came back, I guess I should hang
up.”
“Call me if you need anything.”
“Sure.”
“And take it easy.”