Save your prayers for the morning after,
I have buried something near and dear,
Yet, paradoxically, I am not about to falter,
Well, here’s my story and you’d better hear:

As a kid I was set aside,
Many rules having to abide,
Wartime did not make it easier,
It only made it sleazier.

Regulations, dos and donts,
With guidelines in bold fonts,
Never having a room to breeze,
All optimism having to freeze.

It wasn’t anyone’s fault,
But the cracks widened,
And I fell into the vault,
And sorrow ever deepened.

What can I say in hindsight?
Having to live with the burden,
Hoping things would be all right,
I ended up being my own warden.

Brave boy, I did the best I could,
Living so long with anxiety,
I carried the shame, needed no pity,
And done what no else would.

On all accounts,
I think what counts,
Is that it’s all in the past,
And it really shouldn’t last.

Look at yourself young man,
Stop belittling yourself when you can,
You’ve done well, the future is ahead,
Be sensible! Come on, use your head!

Few would have been where you were,
And came back to reclaim their share,
Give back to me what there is to me,
Fair is fair, and let bygones be.

The malaise has been exterminated,
And a whole chapter was terminated,
At the crematory, the body was burned,
In hell may it rot, forever may it be spurned.

I am sad that my sadness has left,
Deeply rooted, It left an empty place,
But I’ll get used to it, I’ll fill in the space,
Still, at times it still feels like a little theft.

It’s not where you’re from, it’s where your at,
So ladies, let me hear you clap,
Gentlemen you may raise your hat,
Beautiful one, come sit in my lap.

I now see myself, as others saw me,
I speak to myself, rather than to a “he”,
There’s a desolate chill outside my window,
But look at me, inside I am the merry widow.

Yet ungrateful I will never be,
I will mourn for a while,
Sadistic as it may be,
A little sadness over sadness gone is worthwhile.